Dear Diary,

Teddy as usual is being horribly biased. Sure, Belly is girly and exactly like Anna but she IS still an alien like Dimwit. It’s not fair to her. Just because she doesn’t mind wearing all sorts of silly frilly onesies, Teddy seems to think she is worse-off then Dimwit. She didn’t do anything. She just inherited Anna’s disposition. Dimwit’s a lot like Jesse, and not necessarily ALWAYS in the good points. Fastidously clean, not bouncy at all (so much for ADHD. Anna and Jesse don’t have it so I guess he doesn’t either) and terribly goody-two-shoes. He’s still fun to use as a volleyball though. Once you inflate their onesies with helium they can really SOAR. We yoinked one of Anna’s flimsy old one-ply tights which do oh so wonderfully as volleyball nets.

Pizza sent over a load of alien-thingies for the two little aliens. She got them little pizza-patterened onesies and a awesome baby gym which has barbed wire (of course, with little pizzas stuck on the sharp bits), an obstacle course, a tyre swing, a sand-pit burrow warren and a HUGE water slide that winds down into a swimming pool.

Belly and Dimwit are progressing pretty fast. Their little alien wings are sprouting and they have begun flapping them lots (as if that does anything). Anna keeps cooing and fussing about them in between stuffing Jesse with beet-soup and goodness knows what. The vertically-challenged little aliens who are dimunitive in size AND in nature seem to take up most of her attention, leaving us to blow up things with remarkable ease. She didn’t even notice that we had done our evening entertainment and just sat on the smouldering wreckage, whistling and flipping through a BabyDior Catalogue. Speaking of ridiculously small alien clothes, she bought them enough clothes to stitch together and clothe the mothership. At least about 5000 baby socks the sizes of my pinkie. Ridiculous. As if it can fit onto aliens.

We just got back a term report. I degressed to a D-triple minus while Ted, who now slaves away like a goody-two-shoes, got an A+. He was murmuring all sorts of math-y stuff under his breath when he was scribbling on his math test and he even got that silly 6×6x6= 216 question. He’s just SO smart now. Makes me feel *schneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeef* a little *schniff schniff* drop-dead stoooopid.

Well, to get to the main point of my title anyways. Currently, we are off for Utopia. And Hazel is still trying to strangle me when the big o’ lump of lard of our captain isn’t looking since I’m still in my rendition of “Follow the Yellow Brick Road”. Teddy and I are relying on our wings while the rest of the team are on broomstick or are levitating. We are a quater-ways into our journey and we shouid arrive in Utopia by tomorow. Right now, everyone is in camoflage they even rolled in the mud with us after soccer practice (much to Hazel’s disgust).

Teddy: *sticks his nose up in the air* I can’t believe we are coated in this awful muck. I can’t wait to get back home and soak in a hot bath while reading Mermadian history.

Me: Formerly-Cool-Now-Hopelessly-Dorky Dude say whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa?

Hmm… You know what, I think Teddy is growing up!! He’s so smart and everything plus he’s centered around Anna’s bust. I swear, next thing you know, he’s gonna be putting on aftershave or god-know’s what.

Mortified,

ELLA