Dear Diary,

I managed to threaten… ahem… “persuade” Chiplotas and Grogans to authorise rotating shifts and right now I managed to bung my way back to Ocean Blue.

 

I’ve decided that being normal is the pits so I have decided to take Hazel’s advice and become… *big ominous music* ELMO… Of course, erratic Anna Banana keeps insisting that it ain’t elmo and its this silly name… something like emo? Who on earth would want to be called an EMO?!?!? Elmo sounds much more pleasing when you roll it round on your tongue. Anna said that “emos” wear black studded leather jackets with chains and that they live in black. I’m pretty sure elmos wear something to do with ELMO not some silly black leather jackets and chains with skulls. So, I decided to compromise and I came up with an awesome elmo outfit. A black leather jacket with a huge design of Sesame Street printed on the back and a chain with little elmos hanging on them.

 

Belly and Dimwit are so slow and stupid all they say all day is “MAMA!! DADA!! FAAAAAAAN!! ELLWA-WAND-TWEDDWE-ARWE-SWO-STWUPID-AWND-MWAMWA-IWS-THWE-BWEST!!!”. I’m pretty dang sure Anna taught them the last one. She’s working on this hot-housing thingamajig. It’s supposed to start from young but she somehow bunged Teddikins and me in it. Basically, no more playing and tons of studying. Right now she’s got me reciting French Verbs. I’ll give ya a peek:

 

1. Incredule (Incredulous)

2. Mer (Sea)

3. Vaste (Vast)

 

And so on and so forth… TALK about a bore… precious teddikins says I’m growing up but he can just go and sod off… Oops… maybe took too much of Anna’s estrogen pills…

 

That might explain something…

ELLA